Communication
I happened to be discussing my blog's content last night with my son.
His attitude or thinking about my writing style is this: I don't understand what you are saying and no matter how many times I read it, I don't get it, so how then, can I comment? Well, well. Let's look at it this way.
I think that communication is hard work. Whether it is oral or written, making oneself understood to the reader or the listener is indeed a lot of work. This blog is concerned with things that many people do not think about in the average day. Why is that? Well, it is probably because I was born thinking about these things and all people are born differently. Some folks think about what the weather will be, or what the next door neighbor is doing in the yard, or what they will have for their next meal. I, on the other hand, have spent my thinking life, thinking about subjects that others tend NOT to think about. (We will not comment on my weirdness now, will we, RHI? So...to return to communication being hard work after a slight right turn, the answer is this. I am repeating myself. Communication is hard work. It takes energy on the part of the communicator and energy on the part of listener, to make it understood. That means, questions need to be asked if something is unclear.
As the writer of the this blog, I wish to be real clear. However, if I am not, how about writing a question back using a full sentence with a subject, etc. and let's take it from there. What do you think?
His attitude or thinking about my writing style is this: I don't understand what you are saying and no matter how many times I read it, I don't get it, so how then, can I comment? Well, well. Let's look at it this way.
I think that communication is hard work. Whether it is oral or written, making oneself understood to the reader or the listener is indeed a lot of work. This blog is concerned with things that many people do not think about in the average day. Why is that? Well, it is probably because I was born thinking about these things and all people are born differently. Some folks think about what the weather will be, or what the next door neighbor is doing in the yard, or what they will have for their next meal. I, on the other hand, have spent my thinking life, thinking about subjects that others tend NOT to think about. (We will not comment on my weirdness now, will we, RHI? So...to return to communication being hard work after a slight right turn, the answer is this. I am repeating myself. Communication is hard work. It takes energy on the part of the communicator and energy on the part of listener, to make it understood. That means, questions need to be asked if something is unclear.
As the writer of the this blog, I wish to be real clear. However, if I am not, how about writing a question back using a full sentence with a subject, etc. and let's take it from there. What do you think?
Honesty and Friendship
M. Scott Peck, in his "The Road Less Traveled" talks about honesty and friendship. To paraphrase his words that I read so many years ago, true friendship speaks the truth. "I scratch your back, you scratch mine" doesn't have anything to do with true friendship. If people are to be really happy, more on happiness later, then we need to stop making up the rules of life and allow space for honesty, truth, openness and the ability to share our thoughts with each other. Otherwise, how false is our reality?
Honesty
What does honesty mean to you? Is it telling the truth? What does it mean to tell the truth?
If someone asks you a question and you give what you think is the honest answer, but the person who asked the question is offended by the answer, have you been "too" honest? Is there such a thing as being "too" honest.
I happen to think there is. Life is not black and white. It is often times gray. In the gray of life a person who might have difficulty with the starkness of truth, only because they are not used to it, may find it painful to hear. Who is responsible then? The speaker who is communicating the truth is responsible at times, to understand who the listener is and to be mindful of the situation and to take that into consideration before just "emoting" the truth, or better put, the speaker's truth.
Can we talk about truth? I'd like to know what you think. Don't you think that the psychologically-minded person carries a greater responsibility?
If someone asks you a question and you give what you think is the honest answer, but the person who asked the question is offended by the answer, have you been "too" honest? Is there such a thing as being "too" honest.
I happen to think there is. Life is not black and white. It is often times gray. In the gray of life a person who might have difficulty with the starkness of truth, only because they are not used to it, may find it painful to hear. Who is responsible then? The speaker who is communicating the truth is responsible at times, to understand who the listener is and to be mindful of the situation and to take that into consideration before just "emoting" the truth, or better put, the speaker's truth.
Can we talk about truth? I'd like to know what you think. Don't you think that the psychologically-minded person carries a greater responsibility?
Ego....again
I have noticed when I talk to some people that the meaning of ego seems to be misconstrued. In other words if one is to say, "yes, I am good at such and such" and is simply being honest about their talent, this is a healthy ego and not to be misunderstood as being egocentric.
If we think about why we need ego and the good it does for us, we can try to separate it from the egocentric type person who feels the need to protect themselves in a self-serving way.
Webster says this about ego:1. The "I" or self of any person; a thinking, feeling, and conscious being, able to distinguish itself from other selves.
2. egotisim: self-importance. 3. self-esteem or self image.
Now, on the other side of the coin, the side I deem, "not so healthy" is the egocentric or egotistic person, "whose habits of valuing everything only in reference to one's personal interest (opposed to altruism) (again this is from Webster) is the type of individual, who albeit wants a loving, and friend-filled life, finds this desire to be illusory because their self-centeredness disallows the opportunity to approach situations from a position of altruism.
More on ego later and altruism next.
If we think about why we need ego and the good it does for us, we can try to separate it from the egocentric type person who feels the need to protect themselves in a self-serving way.
Webster says this about ego:1. The "I" or self of any person; a thinking, feeling, and conscious being, able to distinguish itself from other selves.
2. egotisim: self-importance. 3. self-esteem or self image.
Now, on the other side of the coin, the side I deem, "not so healthy" is the egocentric or egotistic person, "whose habits of valuing everything only in reference to one's personal interest (opposed to altruism) (again this is from Webster) is the type of individual, who albeit wants a loving, and friend-filled life, finds this desire to be illusory because their self-centeredness disallows the opportunity to approach situations from a position of altruism.
More on ego later and altruism next.
Ego
Why do you think that people have big egos? Have you ever noticed that when
interacting with others on several levels, that certain people cannot be open
and honest because they are protecting their ego?
Have you ever noticed how much trouble and loss people create by trying to protect their egos?
I observe this often and although I am fairly clear on why "they" do this, I would
be interested in your opinion.
What if people in general could drop their ego defense mechanism and be real with themselves and others? Wouldn't this help relationships to work with greater ease.?? I'd like to know what you think.
interacting with others on several levels, that certain people cannot be open
and honest because they are protecting their ego?
Have you ever noticed how much trouble and loss people create by trying to protect their egos?
I observe this often and although I am fairly clear on why "they" do this, I would
be interested in your opinion.
What if people in general could drop their ego defense mechanism and be real with themselves and others? Wouldn't this help relationships to work with greater ease.?? I'd like to know what you think.
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